Paul Herring 6th May 2022

Dear Dad,

Thank you for being there for me, always. Supportive and loving, never judgmental. Thank you for encouraging me to be everything I could be. I always looked up to you and loved you so very much.

I will miss you very much and will cherish all the wonderful times we had together. What a life you led.

Rest now, in peace. Your loving son, Paul.

Tim and Georgina Stephenson 13th May 2022

John Herring was a very fine man.

Tim first met John at Milford in the early 1980s, and right away there was banter between a northern farming Tory and a Liberal-leaning southeastern commuter who (on being declined local magistracy) derided the underlying influence of "the blue-rinse brigade". This delightful phrase captured much of John - firm in his considered beliefs, questioning rather than meekly accepting perceived wisdom and humorous in expression of a contrary view. Like so much else from him, it was all very good learning, and these same traits are identifiable in the contented but faintly quizzical glee in the main picture here, which is indeed the John Herring that we knew.

John had a rare knack of not having to raise his voice - which we never knew him do - in order to be heard, always speaking his good sense and logic in a quiet yet somehow penetrating way. He was a relentlessly hard worker, too, with early and late trains sandwiching long City days which usually began with rapid march across Waterloo Bridge. Home to Hill House, brief and discreet narration of business snippets was often enlivened by hilarious rail tales, all on unstuffy immediate first-name terms.

A boiler suit fitted him just as well as a three-piece, and one rainy Saturday afternoon found him reinsulating the main bathroom, artfully shaping glass wool while avoiding disturbing a firmly boxed-in section, happily observing that he "should leave well alone". Having furnished the necessary roots and wings, he applied that wisdom to his family, too, with two sons and a daughter, and later a wider family, of whom he was justly proud, as ever a credit to him and Pam.

Surrey lost what San Pedro gained. John's life was long, varied and well lived. He was great to know and fun to be with, and our deep sadness at his passing is matched only by marvel at his fine legacy.

With love and all possible best wishes to all,

Tim and Georgie

Trudy and John Neville Cohen 14th May 2022

As we are unable to come to the funeral we decided to write a tribute. But it is impossible to write about John, without including Pam, as they remained a loving couple, ever since their school days.

Through playing bridge in Spain they became close friends of my parents, Betty and George, and they always remained so. We met them often when we visited Mum and Dad, and we soon became good friends too.

There have been many happy times together and they were both so kind and helpful. John was always interested in what was happening to his friends and often was able to provide useful food for thought.

They invited us to have a typical English tea with them a few times, with lots of sandwiches and home made cakes, and on occasion we had a beautiful home made malt bread. But when we complemented Pam, John announced that he had spent all morning in the kitchen!

Another time when we invited them back, Trudy made walnut bread, and to make it even better, added some dates, we were in for a shock when John refused to eat any, as we had no idea that he really hated dates!

When John entered a room, being so tall, good looking, and an athletic tennis player, he made quite an impact. He was worldly-wise and well travelled, very quick-witted and he had a great sense of humour, always charming, and together they have always been such a pleasure to be with. John was an admirable true friend that we will never forget.

We both share in your loss Pam and send you all our love, Trudy and John

Mursel Rexhepi 16th May 2022

John was the best father in law in the world. He was a true gentleman, courteous, polite, considerate & caring. I tried to learn from John at least some of his most excellent qualities. I praised and thanked John and Pam many times for raising a wonderful daughter, who has been the most perfect wife to me for the last 35 years. It was always a pleasure to introduce John to my family and friends, as he would always leave a lasting good impression.

When John and Pam came to Macedonia, my Albanian family were delighted and honored to have John and Pam visiting them. John got on so well with everyone. One year we happened to be in Macedonia for the New Year's Eve. Pam went with my Mother and other neighbours and lady friends to celebrate New Year, whilst John joined the males in the nearby male only restaurant to celebrate New Year with music and food. John was pleasantly surprised that our friends had prepared a fresh venison that they had especially caught that day for him.

John had a few to drink but during this time he was still conscious about the clock and that he needed to be with Pam to wish her a happy New Year when the clock strikes at midnight. Unfortunately John didn’t manage to wish Pam happy New Year at midnight because we kept him entertained in the restaurant with live music and booze and reassured him that Pam was happy with the ladies.

When they eventually met at around 2 am, Pam was a bit sad that John hadn't been with her on the strike of midnight to wish her a happy New year but at the same time relieved to see him. I was thinking, what a considerate man he was.

He was a well travelled man and was keen to know more about our Albanian culture and traditions so that when he met the people he would know everything about them. He didn’t want to to hurt anyone’s feelings.

I was so proud of introducing John as my father in law. One of his many wise words that I’ve learned from John were: "I don’t give advice unless I’m asked." I was regularly astonished by his calm nature, he never swore unless he was telling a joke. I have yet to know anyone more peaceful person than John. If there was a misunderstanding he would try so hard to resolved it in the most polite and considerate manner. I tried to understand how managed this and it was clear that he had abundance of patience, he was the most patient man I’ve known.

Kathleen and I really appreciated the input that John had in the early stages of our business and the advice he was only too willing to give us.

I have been lucky and proud to have had John as my father in law. May he be blessed with eternal paradise.

Roger W Blackford 16th May 2022

I have known many people in my lifetime but I think John has been the most influential and beneficial to my own development. 

I first met John in 1958 at ICI where we both worked. That was 64 years ago. We were both on a sandwich course at Aston University, Birmingham, organised by ICI and John was a year ahead of me. 

Many students at university go there, keep their heads down, concentrate on their studies and do very little else. John was different. In addition to his studies he was enthusiastic to get involved in additional activities. This resulted in his achievement of becoming Vice president of the University Student’s Union and Chairman of the New Society, which involved inviting prominent leaders in the country to give lectures to the students. 

But in addition to his own ambition he was always keen to get other people involved and this is where I benefitted. He persuaded me to become a member of the University’s Students Union and to join the committee of the New Society. I can remember John inviting me to a lunch of the New Society in 1960 together with the invited guest, Jo Grimond, the then Leader of the Liberal Party. That was quite something.

All of this broadened my ability thanks to the help of John and we became close friends. In 1960 John and Pam invited me together with, Corrie, my wife to be, to a holiday tour of Europe in his new Ford Anglia. It really was a journey of discovery visiting 6 countries and the four of us had a super time.

When John graduated from university he returned to ICI and was shortly offered a top job of managing a new paint factory in Nigeria. This I believe was merit for his enthusiasm and capability relative to his activities and attitude at university which I have mentioned. 

We will always remember John for that and congratulate him and Pam for maintaining such a close relationship over so many years.

Roger and Corrie Blackford

Brian Howard 22nd May 2022

It was a privilege to have John as brother-in-law. I will always remember him for his kindness and generosity. In particular I remember his advice to me on education and career possibilities as a young teenager growing up, when he became my brother-in-law in 1957 - and, on one occasion, his surprise at my succeeding in catching a cricket ball with my left hand for which he had offered to pay me one old shilling if successful ... and his wisdom at then refusing to repeat the offer!

I recall his kindness to our parents Eileen and Norman, especially when they both succumbed to the frailties of old age and he helped them to move to a bungalow at Headly close by his own family home, where he was always ready to provide whatever help they needed. I remember his generosity in offering to teach my mother to drive, which resulted in a dented wing of his car the one and only time my mother took up his kind offer! He then demonstrated immense patience whenever he gave a lift to my mother in the car by agreeing to her request never to drive at more than 30 mph so as not to make her nervous. His kindness extended, without any hesitation, to offering to lend me his own car at Headly when visiting my parents, once I had passed my driving test and before I had bought my own first car.

John was someone for whom 'family' was very important and I am so pleased that he and Pam were so ready to welcome my own partner Andrew into his family circle. We had very many happy holidays with them in Spain at Las Terrazas where John's generosity extended to pouring the largest gin-and-tonics we have ever had! He was always concerned to make our visits as enjoyable as possible, meeting us at the airport and organising expeditions to places he thought would interest us.

I am only sorry that circumstances prevented me from seeing him during the past two years, but memories of so many happy times with him over so many years will endure.  

Brian and Andrew

Ian Wakefield 22nd May 2022

So many beautiful tributes and memories of a wonderful man.

I met John about 30 years ago through my friendship with Mursel and Kathy. My first impressions of John were of an intelligent and successful international business man, which clearly he was.

But as I got to know him better and found him to be warm and welcoming, always interested in my life and also so supportive, often giving me career and girlfriend advice 😊, had gave me quite a lot of girlfriend advice over 30 years, always relevant and insightful.

I’m sure my career would also have been quite different without John’s guiding words. Always wanting you to get the best out of yourself and for you to have the best life possible.

We shared many jokes and often played online Scrabble, I think we both enjoyed the challenge.

Thank you John. You will be forever missed and never forgotten.

Your friend

Ian W

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